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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23463832">Mint</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/cerezsis/pseuds/cerezsis'>cerezsis</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Polydiamond Family [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Steven Universe (Cartoon)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst with a Happy Ending, Denial, Dissociation, F/F, Gem Egg Hell, Gemlings, Hurt/Comfort, Mother-Daughter Relationship, Multi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Polyamory, Postpartum Depression, Secret pregnancy, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-04-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 16:01:36</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,369</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23463832</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/cerezsis/pseuds/cerezsis</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>White gets a painful reminder about why denial isn’t the best coping mechanism.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Blue Diamond/White Diamond (Steven Universe), Blue Diamond/White Diamond/Yellow Diamond (Steven Universe), Blue Diamond/Yellow Diamond (Steven Universe), Pink Diamond &amp; White Diamond (Steven Universe), White Diamond/Yellow Diamond (Steven Universe)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Polydiamond Family [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1693279</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>84</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter One</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Blame Moldy for this https://twitter.com/MoldyDraws/status/1243736144480788480?s=20</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>            Denial was something that came almost too naturally to White. Despite her efforts over the years to move away from it, old habits die hard, and given her current predicament, it was far easier to slip back into her old coping mechanism than it was to face reality.</p><p>            It started with pounding headaches around her gem. <em>Odd, but I’m sure it’s nothing,</em> she convinced herself.</p><p>           Soon, her fatigue levels started to rise to the point it was hard to stay awake most days. <em>I’m just working too hard,</em> she again told herself.</p><p>           After a few months, her belly started to grow – a stark contrast to her naturally slender build. <em>Out of sight out of mind,</em> she thought as she shape-shifted back to her usual form.</p><p>           Finally, tiny but strong kicks started coming from her abdomen, something that only increased with frequency as the months passed. <em>It’s fine. It’ll go away. You’re still fine. </em></p><p>            To her credit, it <em>would</em> eventually go away, but not without a painful reminder that she couldn’t just ignore her pregnancy forever.</p><p>            She told herself she just needed a warm bath. Her body ached everywhere, almost like she had the human ailment Steven referred to as “the flu.” Phasing off her clothes, she slipped into the warm water, telling herself that she’d feel better after a soak.</p><p>            Closing her eyes, she sank further into the tub. The warmth of the water felt like heaven, but her body still felt off.</p><p>            <em>Just give it some time. You’ll feel better soon. </em></p><p>           Not ten minutes later, a debilitating pain rippled through her abdomen. Her eyes shooting open in terror, she gripped the edge of the large, in-ground tub. She tried to lift herself out of the water, but only got as far as leaning forward with her elbows on the tub’s edge.</p><p>            <em>No no no! </em>she thought, frantically, <em>This isn’t happening! </em></p><p>            The pain started to ease, but it started up again almost as soon as it stopped. She cried out, gripping her midsection in a futile effort to stop the feeling of her insides being ripped in half. Overwhelmed with panic and pain, White was no longer be able to hold her shape-shifted form, causing the swelling in her belly to reveal itself.</p><p>            Forced to face the reality of the situation, White found herself unable to move. Time didn’t seem to exist anymore. Nothing existed anymore, outside of her bubble of pain. She couldn’t even hear her own thoughts over her own hyperventilating. Warm tears ran down her cheeks and dripped off her chin into the water as the horrible pain kept coming on.</p><p>            Suddenly, she felt something. Pressure. Intense pressure between her legs. Her hyperventilating escalated, and pathetic cries escaped her lips. She’d never felt so alone or vulnerable.</p><p>            Without any warning, an urgent knock came from the other side of the chamber’s door, breaking the deafening silence.</p><p>            “White, are you alright?” Yellow’s worried voice called out.</p><p>            White froze, a whole new kind of panic crashing over her. As terrifying as it was to be alone right now, having someone see her in this state somehow seemed worse.</p><p>            “Everything’s fine!” she half-screamed, unable to stop her panic from slipping into her voice.</p><p>            “We’re coming in, White!” Blue’s equally worried voice insisted.</p><p>            Oh no. They were <em>both</em> here.</p><p>            “No, please!” White desperately pleaded, “Don’t come in here!”</p><p>            The door opened anyway. Blue and Yellow rushed in, but abruptly halted upon seeing her. White forced her head down, unable to hide her shame and embarrassment. Even without seeing them, she could feel their gaze burn into her as their eyes locked on her swollen abdomen.</p><p>            “Oh my stars!” Blue cried out.</p><p>            “White, why didn’t you tell us!?” Yellow pleaded.</p><p>            Still forcing her head down, White couldn’t have answered her even if she wanted to. Without waiting for another word, Blue and Yellow sprinted over to her and each took hold of an arm.</p><p>            “Let’s get you out of –”</p><p>            Yellow’s words were cut off by White suddenly screaming.</p><p>            “No no no no no!” she cried, holding onto their arms with a death grip.</p><p>            Blue’s eyes gazed down between White’s legs.</p><p>            “Oh my stars, she’s starting to crown!”</p><p>            Without a second thought, the two of them jumped into the water with her. As White continued to hyperventilate, Blue and Yellow helped her get into position, and each took hold of a hand.</p><p>            “Start pushing, White!” Yellow ordered.</p><p>            Too overwhelmed to not obey, White’s grip tightened around their hands, and she let out another scream. Yellow placed her free hand on her shoulder, and Blue gently rubbed her back.</p><p>            “You’re doing great, White,” Blue told her, trying to keep a gentle tone, “Keep it up.”</p><p>            Screaming with each push, White couldn’t tell if minutes or hours were passing. Eventually, Blue broke free of her vice grip, and moved down closer to her lower half.</p><p>            “Just one more,” she assured her.</p><p>            Another scream, and the pain and pressure suddenly eased. In one quick but gentle motion, Blue lifted a light green baby out of the water. The tiny diamond stirred and began to cry, a small reflection shining off the five-sided gem on her chest. Shaking and tearing her hand away from Yellow’s, White buried her face in her hands and sobbed hysterically.</p><p>            No one said a word as they got out of the tub. Blue wrapped a small towel around the baby, and Yellow wrapped a larger on around White. Still silent, aside from White’s sobs, they helped her to her room, where she promptly curled up on the pillowy bed. Yellow sat beside her, gently rubbing her back, while Blue stood beside the bed, doing her best to attend to the baby.</p><p>            Eventually, White’s sobs died down, and she managed to fall asleep. The room now dead silent, Blue and Yellow looked at each other, and then down at the baby, sound asleep in Blue’s arms.</p><p>            “Well… we have a baby now,” Yellow said.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter Two</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>White struggles to adjust to motherhood.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>            “She certainly took to the bottle quickly,” Yellow said as she looked down at the feeding baby in her arms.</p>
<p>            Laying on her stomach on the table next to them, Spinel kicked her feet as she stared at the unexpected arrival.</p>
<p>            “Do they not usually like bottles?”</p>
<p>            “From what I’ve read, gemlings typically feed better when they’re nursed,” Yellow explained, “They’ll take to the bottle eventually, but at this age they prefer their mother’s breast. Since White is… it’s just good that she likes the bottle.”</p>
<p>            Spinel nodded. It had been just barely a day since the light green baby came into the world, but everyone was adjusting the best they could. That is, everyone, except for one person. While Blue and Yellow hurried to get everything in order, sending frantic requests to their gems for clothes, toys, and furniture to be made, White insisted on keeping her distance. To say this disconcerted the other diamonds would be an understatement.</p>
<p>            Once the last bit of formula was gone, Yellow carefully removed the bottle’s nipple from the baby’s mouth. The little one yawned and stirred, settling down for more sleep just as Blue entered the room.</p>
<p>            Yellow lifted her head. “How’s White doing?” she asked, though Blue’s expression told her everything she needed to know.</p>
<p>            “She’s… about the same,” she confirmed. Walking closer to them, her expression softened. “Is she still doing well?”</p>
<p>            “Very much so,” Yellow grinned as she sat the bottle down on the table. Trying to be helpful, Spinel stood up and stretched her arms around the diamond-sized bottle, wrapping around it several times, and waddled off to have it cleaned. Their current supply was only so plentiful, after all.</p>
<p>            A small smile upon her lips, Blue gently stroked the infant’s blue-green hair, leaning into Yellow as she did so.</p>
<p>“I still don’t understand why she didn’t tell us.” Her short-lived smile faded away as she looked up at the other diamond. “Did she think we wouldn’t be happy?”</p>
<p>            “I know as much as you do. I can’t understand it either.” Yellow stood up, careful not to disturb the sleeping baby. “We won’t get answers just sitting around. Is she awake?”</p>
<p>            “She was when I left, but I wouldn’t count on getting answers from her. I tried to get her to talk, but she didn’t say much of anything.”</p>
<p>            “Ok, no talking, then.” She looked down at the baby, then back up at Blue. “If we could just get her to <em>hold </em>her, we might be able to establish a starting point.”</p>
<p>            Blue nodded and followed Yellow out into the halls. They quickly arrived at White’s room, where they found she hadn’t moved since Blue left her. She laid on her side, curled up under the blankets, facing the wall. They couldn’t quite see her face, but the points of her hair were clearly visible behind the mound of blankets.</p>
<p>            “White, sit up for a moment,” Yellow requested.</p>
<p>            White lifted her head. Seeing the bundle in Yellow’s arms, she sank back down, keeping her eyes fixated at the dark wall.</p>
<p>            “White, <em>please</em>,” Blue pleaded, her and Yellow moving to her bedside, “Just hold her. Just for a moment.”</p>
<p>            The larger diamond refused to give any kind of response. A thought coming to mind, Blue put her hand on her shoulder.</p>
<p>            “We think we’re going to call her Mint,” she said, “Mint Diamond. Do you like the sound of that?”</p>
<p>            White stayed silent. After a moment, she pulled away from Blue’s touch.</p>
<p>            “Leave,” she finally said, fatigue heavy in her voice.</p>
<p>            “White, she’s your <em>daughter</em>,” Yellow insisted, “She’s <em>our</em> daughter. You need to–”</p>
<p>            “I said <em>leave</em>,” White insisted, her tone much sharper.</p>
<p>            Glancing at each other in defeat, Blue and Yellow sighed.</p>
<p>            “We’re here if you need us, White,” Blue said, before turning around and leaving with Yellow and Mint.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>            Weeks went by. Blue and Yellow tried again and again to get White to talk, or at least bond with baby Mint. White only grew more distant, both physically and emotionally. Wherever Mint was, she made sure to be on the opposite end of the palace, silently wandering in a dissociative daze.</p>
<p>            The other two diamonds worried greatly for her, as she only seemed to be worsening. Finally, in a last ditch, desperate attempt, they found her wandering near Pink’s old wing of the palace and cornered her.</p>
<p>            “White, you <em>need</em> to talk to us!” Yellow half-pleaded, half-commanded.</p>
<p>            “It’s been almost a full cycle, and you haven’t even held Mint,” Blue added, “<em>Please</em>, you have to let us in. Why didn’t you tell us you were pregnant? Why did you hide it from us?”</p>
<p>            White was shaking. She stayed silent, almost unable to speak, staring intently as the pink pillars around them.</p>
<p>            “White, <em>please</em>,” Yellow pleaded again, “Mint needs us. <em>All</em> of us. You can’t avoid her forever. You’re her mother!”</p>
<p>            Still refusing to look at them, White spoke at a volume just barely above a whisper. “No. I can’t be her mother.”</p>
<p>            Surprised but elated to finally have something to work with, Blue and Yellow leaned in closer.</p>
<p>            “What are you talking about?” Yellow asked.</p>
<p>            White wrapped her arms around herself. It took a moment to find the words, anxiety impeding her thought-to-speech process, but eventually she choked it out.</p>
<p>            “Do you really think she’d fair well with <em>me</em> as her mother? I ruin everything I touch; I hurt both of you, I made Pink so miserable she faked being shattered just to get away. Even <em>Steven </em>hates me.” She paused as she started to tear up. “I can’t. If I try to be her mother, I’ll just ruin her too. I know I will. I can’t be trusted with her. I can’t be trusted not to ruin such a precious little thing. I–”</p>
<p>            Before she could process what was happening, she was cut off by Blue and Yellow hugging her. Stiff with shock, she found herself unable to speak.</p>
<p>            “You weren’t the only one who made mistakes, White,” Blue assured her, “Any one of us could’ve said something – could’ve <em>done</em> something differently.”</p>
<p>            “We won’t let the past repeat itself,” Yellow added, “But we have to be a team to make that happen. That includes <em>you</em>.”</p>
<p>            White was silent. Tears trailing down her cheeks, she returned their embrace, and buried her face in their shoulders.</p>
<p>            “I don’t even know how to be a mother,” she said, her voice shaky.</p>
<p>            “Neither do we, really,” Yellow admitted, a small grin on her face, “It seems to be a learn as you go process.”</p>
<p>            “Another thing we’ll figure out together,” Blue added.</p>
<p>            White found herself smiling. She hugged them closer before pulling away, looking them both in the eye as she wiped away her tears.</p>
<p>            “Ok,” was all she said.</p>
<p>            Grinning, Blue and Yellow each slipped one of their hands into hers, and the three of them walked down the halls, making their way towards the nursery. White grew tense as they stepped inside, her eyes locked anxiously on the round, dark colored crib, adorn with green and white patterned bedding. Sensing her unease, the other two each gave her hand a gentle squeeze.</p>
<p>            “Go on,” Blue gently nudged.</p>
<p>            Swallowing her nerves, White let go of their hands and walked over to the crib. Looking down, something knotted in her chest as her gaze fell on the soundly sleeping baby.</p>
<p>            “What if I wake her?” she asked, nervously.</p>
<p>            “She’s a surprisingly good sleeper,” Yellow said, “It should be fine.”</p>
<p>            Hesitant, White reached down into the crib, lifting the infant upwards. Despite Yellow’s assurance, Mint stirred and started to wake, causing White to nearly panic. Just as she was about to put her down and admit defeat, Mint opened her eyes, in turn causing White’s own eyes to widened. It was only then that she realized she hadn’t yet seen her with her eyes open. Mint’s irises were a very pale, almost translucent-looking shade of green, and her diamond-shaped pupils were white, like the gem who carried her. White smiled, feeling a sense of pride, as well as a new, joyous feeling that she couldn’t quite pinpoint. Her nerves melting away, she held her daughter close to her chest.</p>
<p>            “Well hello there, little one,” she said, softly, “I’m your mommy.”</p>
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